I have moved home.
You can now find The Jackson Files here.
I kind of popped over cos I wanted to see what all the fuss was about, and so far I'm digging wordpress.
Will post later.
Byeeeeeeeeee.
8 July 2009
7 July 2009
There's a ton of selfish genes and lazy bones beneath this skin
There's a lot of me that I recognise in Jackson: his big eyes, his mouth, his white gappy teeth, his bi-polar ability to go from happiest-person-in-the-whole-GODDAMN-world to i-hate-you-and-you-and-you-and-you-and-ESPECIALLY-you in 10 seconds flat, the laziness that ensures that his main ambition in life is to sit and watch TV all day, his sense of fun, his sense of humour...ah fuck it, I think he is so perfect that I would lay claim to ALL of him if I could.
But he's not all me, is he? He's 50 per cent someone else. 50 per cent? Well I guess so, but I've only ever caught glimpses of his dad. Like when I see his flushed pink cheeks, when I cut his decidedly weird toenails on his even odder feet, when his skin goes a gorgeous caramel colour in the summer...um...and maybe his eyebrows.
It's hard for me to recognise any of his father's personality traits, because I've never really got to know Jackson's dad. But genes are a funny, undeniable thing, they exist whether the father and mother are together or not. And if I think about it too much, it makes my brain spin...genetically Jackson is part me and part someone else. He belongs as much to his father as he does to me - even though I may not be able to see it. OH YES, TOTAL BRAINFREAK.
Jackson is soon going to become an older brother (I AM NOT PREGNANT. hahaha. clonk), so there will be another person out there who has shares in his genetics. A person who shares in HIS genetics, but NOT mine. OMG, TOTAL BRAINFIZZ.
You see, this is why I don't think too much or too often about this kind of thing, instead I like to look at my gorgeous, funny, adorable, creative (etcetcetcetc) son and say a small prayer of thanks to the god of single parents, something along the lines of "thank you for giving me a spectacular set of mixed-up genes there, lady. You did real good."
[3d glasses for when we went to see Ice Age 3. Loved it.]
But he's not all me, is he? He's 50 per cent someone else. 50 per cent? Well I guess so, but I've only ever caught glimpses of his dad. Like when I see his flushed pink cheeks, when I cut his decidedly weird toenails on his even odder feet, when his skin goes a gorgeous caramel colour in the summer...um...and maybe his eyebrows.
It's hard for me to recognise any of his father's personality traits, because I've never really got to know Jackson's dad. But genes are a funny, undeniable thing, they exist whether the father and mother are together or not. And if I think about it too much, it makes my brain spin...genetically Jackson is part me and part someone else. He belongs as much to his father as he does to me - even though I may not be able to see it. OH YES, TOTAL BRAINFREAK.
Jackson is soon going to become an older brother (I AM NOT PREGNANT. hahaha. clonk), so there will be another person out there who has shares in his genetics. A person who shares in HIS genetics, but NOT mine. OMG, TOTAL BRAINFIZZ.
You see, this is why I don't think too much or too often about this kind of thing, instead I like to look at my gorgeous, funny, adorable, creative (etcetcetcetc) son and say a small prayer of thanks to the god of single parents, something along the lines of "thank you for giving me a spectacular set of mixed-up genes there, lady. You did real good."
[3d glasses for when we went to see Ice Age 3. Loved it.]
6 July 2009
A world away and a lifetime ago
There was a time, in my not too distant past, when I would have spent Saturday at the pub.
I would have watched the rugby with my loud and raucous friends, and with the help of a pint of beer (or seven).
When it was over, we would have drowned our sorrows with another couple of pints and then decide that it was EXACTLY the right time to go out for the night.
We would have gone to a bar, then possibly a club, then - more than likely - we would have ended up at some one's house where, aided by a few Class A's, we would have stayed up all night talking crap and playing 30 Seconds or something like that.
Then, Sunday morning, I would have caught a minicab home where I would have slept all day, got up at 5.00pm-ish, maybe gone back to the pub or stayed in, ordered pizza, drunk more beer and watched rubbish tv until it was time to go to bed again.
I thought about this past life of mine on Saturday as I sat on my sofa drinking tea and watching the rugby with Dave on my left and Jackson on my right. And I thought about how fun it was, and how different I was then to how I am now. I thought about what a great life I used to have and then I thought about my life now.
And then I thought about how I wouldn't swap my life now for my old one. Not for anything in the world.
.....
Behold the adorasplosion that is the Boy Love between The Kid and Jackson...
I would have watched the rugby with my loud and raucous friends, and with the help of a pint of beer (or seven).
When it was over, we would have drowned our sorrows with another couple of pints and then decide that it was EXACTLY the right time to go out for the night.
We would have gone to a bar, then possibly a club, then - more than likely - we would have ended up at some one's house where, aided by a few Class A's, we would have stayed up all night talking crap and playing 30 Seconds or something like that.
Then, Sunday morning, I would have caught a minicab home where I would have slept all day, got up at 5.00pm-ish, maybe gone back to the pub or stayed in, ordered pizza, drunk more beer and watched rubbish tv until it was time to go to bed again.
I thought about this past life of mine on Saturday as I sat on my sofa drinking tea and watching the rugby with Dave on my left and Jackson on my right. And I thought about how fun it was, and how different I was then to how I am now. I thought about what a great life I used to have and then I thought about my life now.
And then I thought about how I wouldn't swap my life now for my old one. Not for anything in the world.
.....
Behold the adorasplosion that is the Boy Love between The Kid and Jackson...
2 July 2009
You did NOT just say that
It may come as a HUGE surprise to all of you, but sometimes I really, really, REALLY piss Jackson off.
Whenever I have annoyed him in the past, he usually just cries and shouts "NAUGHTY MOMMY" at me (and I have his Godmama Henri to thank for introducing him to that phrase) but recently he has developed a more cutting and cruel verbal response.
Now, through his tears of frustration, he shouts in his loudest, meanest voice possible: "I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH YOOOOOOU, MOMMY."
And even though every fibre of my being wants to reply: "cool, does that mean I can grab a glass of wine and watch Masterchef?" I don't, instead I try to look suitably contrite. Because I know that right here, right now, in his adorable two-year-old self, this is the very WORST thing that he can think of to say to me.
Bless his darling heart.
Whenever I have annoyed him in the past, he usually just cries and shouts "NAUGHTY MOMMY" at me (and I have his Godmama Henri to thank for introducing him to that phrase) but recently he has developed a more cutting and cruel verbal response.
Now, through his tears of frustration, he shouts in his loudest, meanest voice possible: "I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH YOOOOOOU, MOMMY."
And even though every fibre of my being wants to reply: "cool, does that mean I can grab a glass of wine and watch Masterchef?" I don't, instead I try to look suitably contrite. Because I know that right here, right now, in his adorable two-year-old self, this is the very WORST thing that he can think of to say to me.
Bless his darling heart.
1 July 2009
hike bike psych like
A dear friend of mine gave me her son's old jbug bike.
The idea is that somehow it is so brilliant and fantastic for a child's bike balance, that by the time they get to one with actual pedals, they know how to ride it without ever having the trauma of having to learn. (Man, that explanation zzzzzz. Sorry.)
Anyway, to say that Jackson loves this bike is the understatement of the millennium. He rides it EVERYWHERE, including last night to clean his teeth. He watches tv while he's sitting on it, let's me read him a story while he's sitting on it and last night, he even tried to convince me let him eat his dinner while he was sitting on it.
So thank you dear friend, you have made a small boy very happy.
[hahaha, excuse the pink socks, they are cousin Lily's and therefore Jackson treasures them almost as much as he treasures his bike]
The idea is that somehow it is so brilliant and fantastic for a child's bike balance, that by the time they get to one with actual pedals, they know how to ride it without ever having the trauma of having to learn. (Man, that explanation zzzzzz. Sorry.)
Anyway, to say that Jackson loves this bike is the understatement of the millennium. He rides it EVERYWHERE, including last night to clean his teeth. He watches tv while he's sitting on it, let's me read him a story while he's sitting on it and last night, he even tried to convince me let him eat his dinner while he was sitting on it.
So thank you dear friend, you have made a small boy very happy.
[hahaha, excuse the pink socks, they are cousin Lily's and therefore Jackson treasures them almost as much as he treasures his bike]
30 June 2009
School news
Yesterday I went to pick Jackson up from school and I was getting my usual hello cuddle and kiss on the lips, when some little punk said to us in an evil voice: "are you two boyfriend and girlfriend?"
Jackson didn't get the meaning of the sentence, but he TOTALLY got the teasing tone and so he didn't want to kiss me again after that. And SMASH went my mommy heart.
I am beyond furious with that wise-ass kid.
In other news, Jackson is being moved up a class at school. Well, I say "moved up", but actually he's just going to the correct class for his age because he was kept back at the end of last year.
I do feel for my kid because, being born on 25 November means he will always be one of the youngest in his class AND he's a boy which means he will mature slower than all the girls.
I guess when he's older it won't make SO much difference, but now if someone in his class is born in January it means that they are almost a year older than him - and at two/three/four that makes a HUGE difference.
If it was down to me, I'd start him in school a year late, but it's not. By law he has to start Grade 1 the year he turns seven, whether that's on 1 January or 31 December.
Not only that, he will ALWAYS have his birthday during end-of-year exams. SIIIIIGH. My poor kid, when I have my next one I am actually going to plan it a bit better.
And so...it's school report time again. I didn't put his first term's report up because it was TERRIBLE and I certainly didn't want it saved on here for posterity. But this one is pretty good, so knock yourself out.
Jackson didn't get the meaning of the sentence, but he TOTALLY got the teasing tone and so he didn't want to kiss me again after that. And SMASH went my mommy heart.
I am beyond furious with that wise-ass kid.
In other news, Jackson is being moved up a class at school. Well, I say "moved up", but actually he's just going to the correct class for his age because he was kept back at the end of last year.
I do feel for my kid because, being born on 25 November means he will always be one of the youngest in his class AND he's a boy which means he will mature slower than all the girls.
I guess when he's older it won't make SO much difference, but now if someone in his class is born in January it means that they are almost a year older than him - and at two/three/four that makes a HUGE difference.
If it was down to me, I'd start him in school a year late, but it's not. By law he has to start Grade 1 the year he turns seven, whether that's on 1 January or 31 December.
Not only that, he will ALWAYS have his birthday during end-of-year exams. SIIIIIGH. My poor kid, when I have my next one I am actually going to plan it a bit better.
And so...it's school report time again. I didn't put his first term's report up because it was TERRIBLE and I certainly didn't want it saved on here for posterity. But this one is pretty good, so knock yourself out.
29 June 2009
A wise person once said to remember that your children only have one childhood
Yay South Africa.
Ha ha sorry for you, you Lions. Man, what a rocking sporting weekend. I always said that I was going to take my son far, far away for the duration of the FIFA World Cup, but not any more. I'm totally into it all now.
We sat in the thick of the Lions fans on Saturday, I was bleak for the most part seeing as I followed the Springboks around the UK and Europe for seven years and only saw them win once and I thought that maybe history was going to repeat itself, or maybe even that it was ME that made them lose. But, deep down, I kept the faith and it was all worth it.
I got Jackson's school report today, but I'll save that joy for you for tomorrow.
I just realised that the title of this post has nothing to do with it's content because I was going to write about something else, something ACTUALLY about Jackson, not me, but it was long and involved and I couldn't quite get into it. Will save that joy for you on Wednesday.
Haven't had a drink or a hangover in more than a week. It's kind of awesome.
Ha ha sorry for you, you Lions. Man, what a rocking sporting weekend. I always said that I was going to take my son far, far away for the duration of the FIFA World Cup, but not any more. I'm totally into it all now.
We sat in the thick of the Lions fans on Saturday, I was bleak for the most part seeing as I followed the Springboks around the UK and Europe for seven years and only saw them win once and I thought that maybe history was going to repeat itself, or maybe even that it was ME that made them lose. But, deep down, I kept the faith and it was all worth it.
I got Jackson's school report today, but I'll save that joy for you for tomorrow.
I just realised that the title of this post has nothing to do with it's content because I was going to write about something else, something ACTUALLY about Jackson, not me, but it was long and involved and I couldn't quite get into it. Will save that joy for you on Wednesday.
Haven't had a drink or a hangover in more than a week. It's kind of awesome.
26 June 2009
Hmmmm...what to write about
I cannot write about how happy I am ANY MORE.
I am even boring myself.
Sorry.
Woza weekend. TGIF. Party on down. And all that.
These were taken a year ago. I am VERY pleased to say that that R500 (yes you read right: R500) rugby jersey STILL fits him.
And he will be wearing it again on Saturday.
And this time next year.
And probably the year after that too.
I am even boring myself.
Sorry.
Woza weekend. TGIF. Party on down. And all that.
These were taken a year ago. I am VERY pleased to say that that R500 (yes you read right: R500) rugby jersey STILL fits him.
And he will be wearing it again on Saturday.
And this time next year.
And probably the year after that too.
25 June 2009
Warning: content could be TMI
I am pretty certain that I have been tagged a number of times to do one of those 10/13/1,000,000,000 random things about me memes.
I'm not sure why I've never done them before - maybe because despite blogging publicly there are still some things I would like to try and keep private. But not today. Today you are in luck because today I am in the mood for some inappropriate over sharing. Although is there *really* such a thing as INAPPROPRIATE over sharing?
So here we go - TMI Thursday:
1. I wrote a speech for former SA President Thabo Mbeki. It was for the opening of the Marc Chagall exhibition at the Standard Bank Art Gallery. Unfortunately, I left the country before the actual event, so I never got to hear it. However there was a report in the newspaper that said that he: "really knew his stuff." Whatever.
2. I don't believe in best friends. I had a best friend for ages and then I lost him (sounds like I lost him under the sofa or something - hahahah). It made me a little emo at the time. Now I like to have loads of different best-ish friends that meet all my different needs. That way I don't have unrealistic expectations of any one person. I think it's called not putting all your eggs in one basket.
3. Dave is 28. Nine whole years younger than me. I guess that makes me a cougar. But you can call me Coug. I am going to go out and get me some fake boobs, blond hair, a tan and loads of gold jewellery.
4. I have a MASSIVE crush on HHP. I love him and his music totally and absolutely. Afterall, what would summer be without Jabba?
5. I feel desperately sad for Jackson's father - circumstances, finances, distance, whatever, means that he has only seen Jackson a handful of times. As Jackson is now 943 days old, that means that his father has woken up 888 times knowing that he is not going to see his magnificent son that day. Poor, poor man. I wish things were different for him.
6. I have a sneaking suspicion that I might be an alcoholic/borderline alcoholic. Undeniably, it's in my genes, and while I really hate to waste good genes, I have quit drinking for a while. The thought of losing alcohol makes me sadder than losing my best friend. Which is probably why I need to give it up.
7. I am in the middle of an extremely strict and boring diet.
8. Apart from my son, Dave is the person that I enjoy spending time with most in all the world. I adore him, he makes me want to be a better person, he completes me. Etc etc etc.
9. It always comes as a complete surprise to me when I find out that people don't like me. I'm all "huh, what's not to like?". And then I move on.
10. There is no one else that can make me laugh like Jackson does. I especially laugh when Jackson laughs. And the things that make Jackson laugh are: people falling over, people falling down, people falling off things and people falling through things etc. And video clips of himself.
He has watched this little masterpiece aproximately 34 times, and laughed like a maniac each and every single time.
I'm not sure why I've never done them before - maybe because despite blogging publicly there are still some things I would like to try and keep private. But not today. Today you are in luck because today I am in the mood for some inappropriate over sharing. Although is there *really* such a thing as INAPPROPRIATE over sharing?
So here we go - TMI Thursday:
1. I wrote a speech for former SA President Thabo Mbeki. It was for the opening of the Marc Chagall exhibition at the Standard Bank Art Gallery. Unfortunately, I left the country before the actual event, so I never got to hear it. However there was a report in the newspaper that said that he: "really knew his stuff." Whatever.
2. I don't believe in best friends. I had a best friend for ages and then I lost him (sounds like I lost him under the sofa or something - hahahah). It made me a little emo at the time. Now I like to have loads of different best-ish friends that meet all my different needs. That way I don't have unrealistic expectations of any one person. I think it's called not putting all your eggs in one basket.
3. Dave is 28. Nine whole years younger than me. I guess that makes me a cougar. But you can call me Coug. I am going to go out and get me some fake boobs, blond hair, a tan and loads of gold jewellery.
4. I have a MASSIVE crush on HHP. I love him and his music totally and absolutely. Afterall, what would summer be without Jabba?
5. I feel desperately sad for Jackson's father - circumstances, finances, distance, whatever, means that he has only seen Jackson a handful of times. As Jackson is now 943 days old, that means that his father has woken up 888 times knowing that he is not going to see his magnificent son that day. Poor, poor man. I wish things were different for him.
6. I have a sneaking suspicion that I might be an alcoholic/borderline alcoholic. Undeniably, it's in my genes, and while I really hate to waste good genes, I have quit drinking for a while. The thought of losing alcohol makes me sadder than losing my best friend. Which is probably why I need to give it up.
7. I am in the middle of an extremely strict and boring diet.
8. Apart from my son, Dave is the person that I enjoy spending time with most in all the world. I adore him, he makes me want to be a better person, he completes me. Etc etc etc.
9. It always comes as a complete surprise to me when I find out that people don't like me. I'm all "huh, what's not to like?". And then I move on.
10. There is no one else that can make me laugh like Jackson does. I especially laugh when Jackson laughs. And the things that make Jackson laugh are: people falling over, people falling down, people falling off things and people falling through things etc. And video clips of himself.
He has watched this little masterpiece aproximately 34 times, and laughed like a maniac each and every single time.
Tickle from Rebecca Humphry on Vimeo.
24 June 2009
Doesn't it feel much better when you have a better day than yesterday
Jackson's favourite word is still NO. I thought I would count for you exactly how many times he said no yesterday, but then I got on with living my life instead.
He also creeps into my bed pretty much every night, kinda without me noticing to be honest. It's real cold, you know, and it's nice to have a small warm cuddly, snuggly thing in the crook of your arm, making you unconsciously release happy love hormones.
He also did it the other night when Dave was there though. I wondered for a minute if it was weird having them both in bed with me, but whatever, it's my weird - go get your own.
Have I ever mentioned how much Jackson ADORES our cat, Genius?
Like with a flaming passion that cannot ever be extinguished - not even by a tsunami. Genius does not share this passion. Nope, not much at all.
Dave and I have tickets to go and watch the Springboks v the Lions at Loftus on Saturday. Ha ha. I can just feel your jealously seeping through the internet.
Oh my gosh, my life is boring right now. Happy and wonderful but totally boring. Man, I love it like that.
He also creeps into my bed pretty much every night, kinda without me noticing to be honest. It's real cold, you know, and it's nice to have a small warm cuddly, snuggly thing in the crook of your arm, making you unconsciously release happy love hormones.
He also did it the other night when Dave was there though. I wondered for a minute if it was weird having them both in bed with me, but whatever, it's my weird - go get your own.
Have I ever mentioned how much Jackson ADORES our cat, Genius?
Like with a flaming passion that cannot ever be extinguished - not even by a tsunami. Genius does not share this passion. Nope, not much at all.
Dave and I have tickets to go and watch the Springboks v the Lions at Loftus on Saturday. Ha ha. I can just feel your jealously seeping through the internet.
Oh my gosh, my life is boring right now. Happy and wonderful but totally boring. Man, I love it like that.
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